Hilarious, scathing responses to Morrison’s ‘bullsh*t’ plan

Described as Abbott’s re-heated homework from 2015, the Morrison government’s wildly overdue net zero 2050 plan will see Australia front up to the global climate summit in Glasgow next week holding little more than a printed prayer. The limp emissions reduction “plan” comes in spite of overwhelming support from voters, nearly a decade  in power, and fresh backing from the Murdoch media.

Australians are ecstatic:

"Angela, he held up a printed glossy pamphlet of a PowerPoint slide presentation for the cameras! He kept saying 'plan plan plan—we have—I have—a plan' over and over again, BUT IT WAS ONLY A PAMPHLET OF A POWERPOINT PRESENTATION WITH A MISSION STATEMENT IN IT!" #auspol #NetZero pic.twitter.com/yHX0oszmc0

— Jenny Frecklington-Jones; pure "Prole" 🌏🏳️‍🌈💉 (@JonesHowdareyou) October 26, 2021

I like the fact that the copyright notice on “Australia’s long term emissions reduction plan” is 2020. The government has been sitting in this for some time!

— Warwick McKibbin (@WarwickMcKibbin) October 26, 2021

Previous works in the "Australian Way" series include:
🔸The Plan to Procure Vaccines the Australian Way
🔸 The Plan to Combat Bushfires the Australian Way
🔸The Plan to Protect Anonymous Donors the Australian Way
🔸The Plan to Address Womens Rights Issues the Australian Way pic.twitter.com/0SG6pR7Fh8

— Leo Jai (@lionheartleojai) October 26, 2021

Really great to read the government’s 2050 net zero strategy today, here’s a summary if you didn’t get a chance pic.twitter.com/3rzl6Uy2Lb

— 🎃 4:55pm press conference 🎃 (@therevmountain) October 26, 2021

A Sydney man has set an ambitious target to phase out his alcohol consumption within the next 29 years, as part of an impressive plan to improve his health. https://t.co/5RvcF9pN8R

— The Shovel (@TheShovel) October 25, 2021

Here's my highly detailed Plan to make $10million by 2050.

I call it The Sheales Way. pic.twitter.com/YR6I5MQpLJ

— Ryan Sheales (@RyanSheales) October 26, 2021

Australia's on track to read net zero by about 2093, going by the latest projections: https://t.co/Hf9nbsgQEN

— Ketan Joshi (@KetanJ0) October 26, 2021

the government presenting their net zero by 2050 target pic.twitter.com/qG8YqTwKpH

— andie (@anndeejam) October 26, 2021

Labor really trying to get through to the kids pic.twitter.com/5tS3Eeulv9

— Justine Landis-Hanley (@justinel_h) October 26, 2021

🇬🇧 UK 2050 plan? 21 docs. 1868 pages. Heat & building strategy. Heat pump grants. EV incentives. End gas boilers by 2035, ICE sales by 2030! Treasury reviewed. CCC approved. Pathways for every sector to 2037. Legally binding. 5 year targets.

🇦🇺 Aus? No plan. Just more bullshit.

— Mike Cannon-Brookes 👨🏼‍💻🧢🇦🇺 (@mcannonbrookes) October 26, 2021

Ok. I read all 129 pages of the pamphlet. Its not worth the paper I didn’t print it on.

I understand technology damn well. This isn’t a “technology driven approach”. It’s inaction, misdirection & avoiding choices.

I’m going to bed. This is just ridiculously embarrassing.

— Mike Cannon-Brookes 👨🏼‍💻🧢🇦🇺 (@mcannonbrookes) October 26, 2021

This is not a plan to get to net zero. This is a set of assumptions – with nothing to underpin them released today – of what might happen because of technology.

— Adam Morton (@adamlmorton) October 26, 2021

Mouthing the word “plan” 33 times can’t hide the fact after 8 years in power the Liberals have no plan to respond to climate change, and no interest in having a plan. pic.twitter.com/rNvAcgty9A

— Mark Dreyfus (@markdreyfusQCMP) October 26, 2021

It's such a classic Morrison / Taylor staffer ploy. They feel so clever about it, too. They take whatever it is that makes Australia uniquely bad in the world, and then twist it specifically to make it look like walking back from being the worst is "ambition"

— Ketan Joshi (@KetanJ0) October 26, 2021

Scott Morrison finally unveils his net zero plan with:
Zero detail
Zero modelling
Zero new info

Does he seriously think Australians will fall for his scam?

— Tanya Plibersek (@tanya_plibersek) October 26, 2021